All you’ve invested is an hour or two of your time and the cost of a glass of wine or coffee (see #4).Send a polite “I’m flattered but I’m not feeling it, best of luck” text and be on your merry way. If you would like to see this person again, say so!When you get that text yourself, let that roll right off. It will mostly likely not lead to anything, that’s just statistics. Be a grown-up and say the words, “I had a good time and I’d like to see you again.” There, was that so hard?You don’t like everyone, everyone isn’t going to like you; it’s called being human. You are both taking a little leap of faith here, so financial equality is the way to go. If your date is a stand-up human being, they will give you an honest response.
Situations B and C can be tricky, no doubt about it, but they are not the end of the world.It’s tempting to call him a bad man like the bad men out of the stories women friends tell me. The link above leads to an article discussing the reverse of this situation, how men keep getting drawn to women who are, well, “crazy”. But if many women really need to think about what they want, then so do many, many men.It’s somehow easier to call people bad or good or crazy, and understand the stories of our lives that way, especially when people hurt us. I recognize this, in my own friends and in my past too. I head into each date hoping for a pleasant conversation with a friendly, interesting person; that is exactly as high as I’m willing to set the bar.
Those of you who have been around the block know that your dates will miss that mark more often than you’d think.
so they deserve one another.”This stuck in my head, especially after today finding out that one of my old friends from high school is secretly dating 2 women at once.