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Yet another misunderstanding is the claim that INFJs “read into things that are not there” or “make mountains out of molehills.” Such accusations can be troubling for INFJs, since reading into things by way of their Ni is what they are born to do.In many cases, such accusations derive not from any wrongdoing on the part of the INFJ, but from the assumptions or ego sensitivities of their partners. ” or “You don’t seem yourself today” INFJs are trying to gather more information in order to better understand their partner.But just because INFJs are quicker to express their emotions does not make them any needier than FP types.In fact, since most men (i.e., TP males) use Fe rather Fi, they might appreciate the fact that, when paired with an INFJ, they needn’t guess about what their partner is feeling. And while forming quick friendships and extensive connections may be the goal for some extraverts, for INFJs, this is not the point at all. Due to their extraversion of Feeling (Fe), they can readily ingratiate themselves to others.The title of David Keirsey’s book, Please Understand Me, aptly expresses what INFJs are seeking in their relationships. Considering their status as the rarest of all personality types, this comes as little surprise.There are numerous misunderstandings about INFJs that could potentially hamper their dating and relational success.
INFJs differ from the cultural norm in this respect, as the emotionally-restrained presentation of Fi predominates among females. In their friends, as well as their romantic partners, they seek intelligence (both intellectual and emotional), honesty, openness, and authenticity. Rather, INFJs seek high quality, in-depth relationships.It is therefore critical that INFJs and their partners work to understand the nature of and challenges associated with the INFJ’s inferior function, Extraverted Sensing (Se).
Having already enumerated the nature of their Se in my e Book, , our focus here will entail facets of their Se that are particularly relevant to their functioning in relationships.This can leave INFJs feeling like there is no ready outlet for their wisdom and that no one really understands their essential worth or value.