He must be concerned for others and must be accommodating.
If you have these five elements in your character, you will definitely manage a church well.
However, although we speak of accommodation, this should not be something done artificially.
An elder must have a thorough, diligent, and stable character.
Motto: "Whatever." The accommodating style is one of sacrifice, selflessness and low assertiveness.
You are willing to give up just about everything in order to preserve the relationship with the other party.
It is certainly reasonable to use this strategy when the issue at hand is something of little importance to you.
An elder should have still another item of character, that of accommodating others.
The problem with care-taking isn’t that they’re kind to others.
The problem is that they’re kind to others at the expense of themselves.
For those people who struggle to say no, here are a few tips to build those muscles:1. When someone asks you to do something tell him or her you have to think about it and will get back to them. Make yourself say no at least one out of every 5 times.
Take the time to think if this is something you really want to do, can do and should do before you respond. For larger requests such as taking on a new project, watching a friend’s child etc., tell the person you will get back to them in 24 hours. Practice with a close friend, playfully ask your partner to ask you something or tell your parent no when you really don’t want to do something.4. If you are already over-extended, refuse to take a new thing without letting go of something else. It’s a gift to you, your children (so they learn to take care of themselves) and to your partner.
The bottom line is they’re all about taking care of everyone else and seldom care for themselves.